Olympic Distance Double Header

Coming into this season I wanted return to some “longer” distance racing with the Olympic/Standard distance event. It’s been a few years since I had really done an Olympic distance of 1.5km Swim – 40km Bike – 10km Run, and with it being an Olympic year, why not! I entered Eastbourne back in January but got suckered into doing Windsor too from a bit of peer pressure, and also the draw of British champs. Unfortunately, they were back-to-back weekends.

Event: Royal Windsor Triathlon | British Championships
Date: 9th June 2024

Even though this is one of our local ‘big’ races, I’ve never entered. I thought I should give it a go, especially as it’s hosting the British Championships it should have a strong field of competitors.

Massive turnout for this one, well over 1000 in the Olympic distance and it was noticeable, very congested in all areas of the event.

Swim – Downstream swim in the Thames for 1km, absolutely flying with the pack, close to 1:00min/100m. Unfortunately, after the turn buoy it turns upstream and this is where it turns into survival of the fittest, and a bit of a washing machine, we caught some of the slower swimmers from previous waves and I lost sight of the faster guys in my wave. So had to dig in hard solo from here.

Bike – Pretty solid, feeling as comfy as you can be pushing hard on a TT bike. The only complaint was the sheer number of competitors on the course and it being on open roads, led to a few ‘dodgy’ situations, and a couple of hold ups.

Run – Consisted of 3 out and back laps up and past the castle and then part way down the Long Walk. This is where it fell apart. My body was not having it, and my pace was falling every lap.

It was a great experience racing such a stacked field at an iconic venue and to come away with 2:18:24. 10^th /147 in Age Group and 47^th /1349 Overall I was actually very pleased with.

The week following Windsor was all about recovery and I wasn’t sure I’d be able to make it to be honest, I had some very sore calves and I think I twinged something in my right arm on the swim. Thankfully some very restful days, a couple easy swims and some easy running sorted me out and I was feeling fairly fresh for the following Sunday, maybe not 100%, but ready to give it a good bash.

Event: Eastbourne Triathlon | World Age Group Qualifier
Date: 16^th June 2024

I entered this race towards the start of the year, and I thought it would suit me great, it includes a tough sea swim, and a lumpy, slightly technical bike course.

The day prior and on the journey down I was receiving updates from the organisers on the weather and the potential for the swim to be canceled, it wouldn’t surprise me considering the weather we were experiencing that weekend was terrible.

On arrival the swim was still being debated, with the current plan for a shortened, 750m swim, and altered course. Great, at least that’s something. The sea state was wild, strong westerly winds were whipping up some quite big swell. Even a small bit of chop is quite noticeable when swimming.  So, looking at the conditions, I was feeling a bit apprehensive, and that’s from someone quite confident in their swimming ability.

15mins later, cancelled, and new plan announced. We would do a duathlon.

So, reset, it would now be a Run – Bike – Run. In the back of my mind I had always considered we could be doing a duathlon, so I had remembered to pack socks in my kit bag, and was mentally already prepared for this to happen. Other than putting socks on, not much had changed, maybe a slightly more run focused warm-up and a slight re-organisation of transition area.

Run 1 – 5km – Having never done a duathlon I wasn’t exactly sure what to expect, but I knew I had to pace myself, and that’s what I tried. I tried to keep a controlled pace and made good use of fellow competitors to draft on the windy exposed sections of the run. Averaged around 3:55/km which felt sensible.

Bike – 36km 800m Elevation. Straight out onto the bike and straight uphill and into a strong headwind. I chose a road bike for this course and the field was heavily skewed towards road bikes vs TT bikes. On a calmer day it’s probably quicker on a TT bike especially if you’re confident descending, but today it was pretty even, the wind on the cliff tops was brutal it was an effort to keep momentum even on the downhills.

Run 2 – 10km – Survival mode activated, again! My legs were done, it was now quite hot too. I ended up running slower than at Windsor with a 42:40. I’ll admit there were a couple of moments I contemplated throwing in the towel on that final run. But you know our motto, NEVER SHOW WEAKNESS. I forged on doing what I could, and even managed a little sprint finish.

Came away with 2:19:39. 8^th in Age Group and 48^th Overall. I definitely could have done with the swim to split the field up and play more to my strengths.

Between Eastbourne and Windsor, I’d sooner do Eastbourne again. I felt the organisation and delivery of the event was much better, and the closed road bike course was a big bonus, also there were some quite nice freebies 😊

Back to Sprints now for the rest of the year!

Event: Staffordshire 70.3 Ironman
Date: 11th June 2023

I’ve had my heart set on completing an Ironman ever since starting triathlon, but I thought a Half Ironman would be a good challenge itself, so signed up to Staffordshire 70.3 with some friends from university. I was pretty confident about my ability to finish the race given I was comfortable with those distances and had done other endurance events (although no triathlon longer than a sprint distance), but had very low expectations of my times.

The entry prices are very expensive as the race takes a huge amount of administration, road closures, equipment, etc. Granted, you do get a lot of freebies with your sign-up like food, drinks and a T-shirt or having a tree planted, but it still seemed a bit steep compared to other race organisers.

Unfortunately, about 8 weeks before the race I got Achilles tendinitis so running in the build-up was minimal. It seemed every tester run just sent me back to square one in recovery. This meant my race day plan was to not do the run at all, given my main race of the season (World Sprint Championships) was only a month after.

The day before I spent travelling to Stafford via 3 conveniently delayed trains, meeting my overheating family in the car who had driven there to support me and rushing around the split transitions to get everything in place. Getting out of transition one minute before it shut was a wonderfully relaxing way to spend a birthday.

After good food and a good sleep however, I was ready to give it my best shot and woke up at 05:00am on race day feeling pretty stress-free given my low expectations! That didn’t last long though as I stood in the Portaloo queue hearing the swim time I wanted to self-seed myself in (the 30-35 minute wave) was being sent off. I eventually entered the water in the 40-45 minute slot and quickly found a good rhythm, keeping within my aimed pace despite having to swim around quite a lot of people. Leaving the water after 1.9km I got stuck behind dawdlers on some uncomfortable matting over rocks but executed T1 fairly efficiently.

Onto the 90km bike, the first 10km was pretty nasty, stuck behind people on tight and potholey roads. Then I realised sub-3 hours might be within reach given the run would be a write-off anyways. The ride was pretty rolling in terms of hills with an incredible amount of side-line supporters. It was a nice, thankfully shady route and I absolutely loved it. My ankle started to hurt at kilometre 20-30 but lessened as the ride went on. I’m not sure if I could’ve ridden at this speed if I was planning to run a decent half marathon after, but it was a good lesson in what my body can cope with. My only complaint was that my trisuit gave me chafing but it wasn’t too painful and peeing on the fly might not have helped but getting off the bike is a waste of time when racing (sorry to the competitor overtaking me at this point).

Rolling into T2 in 02:58:22 I was very happy with myself and the pain in my ankle had gone so began the 21.1km run. The heat hit down hard but the town centre atmosphere carried me for a few kilometres. Then the pain set in and I slowed down to a jog. After another kilometre or so I realised that although I certainly felt fine otherwise to keep racing, it wasn’t worth the damage to my tendon. So, I pulled out of the race and walked about 3 kilometres to the finish line through many frustrating “GO ON”s and “KEEP RUNNING”s which was pretty mentally crushing. My family were a bit surprised to see me on the outside of the finish chute and not in it, but had also been expecting me not to even start the run.

It was nice to try out an official Ironman event and I definitely plan to be back for more – the organisation and atmosphere were otherworldly.

Event: SOWS Race Series
Date: 27th June 2024

The Shepperton Open Water Swim Race Series returned to Shepperton Lake on June 27th with 750m, 1.5km, and 3km distances being offered. Apparently, the race series hasn’t happened in 5 years but they’re back for good, and perfect timing for it! There isn’t anything better than finishing work and going to a sunny lake feeling hyped for a cheeky race.

About 70 people pitched up to Shepperton Lake, with about 40 taking part in the swim. Everything was well organised, there was food and drink by the lake, and the staff were very friendly.

Regarding the race.. if you think you’re a great swimmer, you might have to attend the SOWS Race Series to be humbled! The quickest time for the 3km was 39 mins! There were some incredibly fast individuals and I was extremely impressed by the pace. I tried my best and finished in 54 mins but it’s probably safe to say I could’ve shaved off a couple of minutes if I didn’t eat 2 bacon halloumi baps before the race! 🍔

If you’re interested in the next SOWS race, it’s happening on July 18th. Perhaps cya there!

Event: 24hr Swim Relay | Level Water
Date: 8-9th June 2024

This June marked the third year Level Water has hosted their 24hr Swim Relay in our beloved Shepperton Lake. For those that aren’t aware, Level Water is an amazing charity that helps bring the power of swimming to children with disabilities, by allowing children to develop strength, coordination and confidence in the water.

Pre-Event Planning

With this event hosted in our local Shepperton Lake, this was also the third year running that the Viceroys have taken part in this event. This year, VTC entered across three teams, with a total of 24 club members!  Ahead of the event, VTC Swim Captain Rachel Hall helped get us all in line with her trusty spreadsheet, arranging all our swims and kit for the event (thank you once again, Rachel!).

Saturday Into Sunday

Getting onsite early, the team set up camp next to the lake and navigated tent space real estate with our neighbouring teams. Once settled, and with the three VTC teams registered, the rest of the team began to filter in ahead of the start of the event.

As the countdown began, at exactly 12pm, the first swimmers from each team entered the water. With lots of photos and videos taken, the non-swimmers headed back to camp. At the turn of each hour, the team would head to the lake entry point, and cheer on the swimmers as they came out of the water and exchanged with the next three VTC swimmers.

As the day turned into night, all swimmers needed lights on the back of goggles, and lights inside their tow floats. The lights also switched on on the turning buoys in the water and the lifeguards, as each kayak lit up in the water. The night swims brought a completely different feel to the swims, and for those lucky enough to be in the water during the 3-4am slot, they saw the sun begin peaking back up over the tree line as you swam around the lake.

As the sun continued to rise, our beloved Lance cracked open his portable grill, and got to work on feeding our camp with bacon and eggs, something I know we all very much enjoyed and appreciated!

Closing Out The Weekend

With the final slot of 11-12am on Sunday, Level Water outlined all the money raised as part of the weekend (a whopping £135,000), and the impact it would have on those whom they support. In the final hour, all teams that had entered the event took to the water one last time, that’s almost 500 swimmers! This included our very own llama, who dedicatedly swam around the lake under the care of Carla and Marit.

With that being a wrap for the swims, the tents came down, the kit was packed away, and snacks taken home/eaten. The event was another huge success for Level Water and one we looked forward to next year!

Event: Martian Race 👽
Date: 16^th June 2024

The Martian Race is where War of the Worlds meets Mars Attacks, only this time you’re running for fun and not for your life, just a small difference!

It’s was a real family day out as there’s a 2km Mini Martian race (kids), this year a lion even did the run, then a 5km, 10km and 21km option.

The start/finish line was in the beautiful McLaren Technology Park and every year we’ve done the race, there’s been gorgeous sunshine, they must pre-order it.

The course begins through the open fields of McLaren Technology Park, the start funnel was much wider this year, so plenty of space for Peter to overtake and me to be overtaken, although you do have to keep an eye out for the odd hole in the ground. Then it was under the trees through Horsell Common (watching out for tree roots), over the famous War of the Worlds sandpits (watching out for aliens), and back into the sunlight at Heather Farm.

Heather Farm is the turning point for the 10km and as you begin to loop back, you get to enjoy the Heather Farm wetland area as you run along board walks and over little bridges. And just as you think you might melt in the sunshine, you head back into the cool forest and a welcome water station is not far off.

Almost half of Horsell Common is designated as a Site of Special Scientific Interest, so even though I was exhausted, the various changes in scenery were pretty amazing.

Coming towards the finish line, with an enthusiastic lion running the last 20 meters alongside me, I was greeted with a lot of cheers and a medal. This year, as it was my birthday, I was also greeted with a lovely bottle of champagne! Not a bad way to celebrate!

Such a fun event and the early bird entry prices are amazing! Plus, you’re supporting local charities through Woking Lions (hence the 🦁).

Event: Vätternrundan
Date: 15th June 2024

Vätternrundan 2024: The Epic Adventure of the VTC Team

This year, our intrepid VTC (Viceroys Triathlon Club) team embarked on the world’s largest recreational bike ride—a whopping 315 km journey around Lake Vättern in Sweden. The lineup: Richard “The Resilient” Hill, Nick “The Speedster” Christian, Marit “The Machine” Sõrmus, and me, also known as “The Last-Minute Airport Resident.”

Pre-Race Shenanigans: British Airways vs. The Bike

The adventure kicked off a day before the actual race when British Airways decided that road bikes weren’t their cup of tea. While Nick, Richard, and Marit began their leisurely four-hour drive from Stockholm to Motala, I found myself with a new friend at the airport, both of us staring wistfully at the arrivals board for what was hopefully going to be the arrival of our bikes on the next flight.

Nine hours, one newly hired car, and a friendship forged in the fires of airline-induced frustration later, we rolled into Motala just after 9 PM. Thankfully, my stellar teammates had everything ready for me, including a much-needed evening meal and, most importantly, a beer. With my bike hastily assembled by another team effort worthy of an F1 pitstop (untested, naturally), we hit the sack by 11 PM, dreaming of the next 4 AM alarm that awaited us.

Race Day: 5 AM Start with Perfect Weather and “BA Buns”

Bright-eyed and bushy-tailed (well, sort of), the VTC squad rolled out at 5 AM sharp under perfect blue skies. The weather was decent: a bit windy, but with beautiful views around Lake Vättern that made every pedal stroke worthwhile. The plan was simple: stop at all nine feed stations to stave off monotony and prevent our feet from seizing up and get the job done. And to our utter delight, not one person had to shout “hole” for at least the first 180 km—the road surface was impeccable, a stark contrast to the pothole-riddled roads of Surrey.

We maintained a strong pace, joining forces with pelotons exceeding 40 kph, pushing our average speed well over 30 kph for the first half. There were a few touch and go moments with some slightly inexperienced riders hanging on for dear life on the back of a 50+ well organised peloton but we all remained upright with some careful manoeuvring (including a strong dash to the front by Mr Hill in the quest to avoid any further danger!).

The feed stations provided a delightful array of water, electrolytes, blueberry soup!!, and the soon-to-be-famous “BA buns”—those tasteless, dry-as-a-desert buns you get on a British Airways plane (in a wrapper) that, while not exactly gourmet, were a step up from energy gels and shot blocks.

To break up the food monotony, we were treated to a feast of meatballs and mash in Jönköping (104 km) and then lasagne at Hjo (171 km). These were washed down with more blueberry soup and, of course, more BA buns!

The Windy, More Elevated, Hard Second Half

As we entered the second half of the race, the wind decided to crank up the difficulty level. Despite the battering from head and side winds, even after 200 km and in the absence of larger pelotons (all trains had left the station by the halfway point), our quartet managed to maintain a 30 kph average between the food stops – quite some effort on tired legs. Getting over the 200 km marker was a great boost, albeit quickly flattened by the next marker at 205 km indicating 110 km (a mere “long” Saturday ride) to go.

The penultimate stage, between feed stops 7 and 8, was a brutal stretch of continuous elevation in high winds. Marit, ever the optimist, didn’t want to know what lay ahead but soldiered on with the reassurance that the end of the hill was (somewhat) near (yes, course it was Nick!) 😊.

Despite all this we remained a tight group all the way through with everyone making massive efforts on the front, not once did we split so the training clearly paid off. The continual reapplication of chamois cream really paid off on this ride (thanks for that tip, Euan!).

While this was not a closed-road event, the marshalling and signage were top-notch, making it unnecessary to rely on our Garmins—a relief, given our concerns about battery life.

The final section was a blast, with each of us taking turns at the front, pushing through the pain and fatigue at over 35 kph. Richard lost his sense of humour, which is a rarity, with 15 km to go, but we dragged each other through the final, seemingly endless, straight to big smiles as we could see the end.

The Grand Finish: VTC Victorious

Crossing the finish line, side by side in our pink VTC kit, was a triumphant moment. It was the longest ride any of us had completed, and doing it together made the achievement even sweeter. From airport delays to headwinds that could knock over a large mammal, the VTC team conquered it all with grit, determination, and a good dose of humour….and of course, the BA buns.

Event: Free Tri Series Walton (IntoTri)
Date: 19th May 2024

This is a lovely, FREE, very relaxed triathlon, with children over 7 years even able to enter. Plus, it’s as local as it gets at the Xcel Centre. For adults, you can do a Senior Short (400m swim, 10k bike, 2.5k run) or Senior Long (400m swim, 20k bike, 5k run). Considering most triathlons cost about £40 to enter, I was amazed and excited that this one was free. 

My triathlon journey started aged 49 years young, post Covid, in 2021. I could only swim breaststroke (but always wanted to learn front crawl) and had never been on a road bike (never mind in cleats).  But I had run two marathons (slowly – 5hrs ish) and loved outdoor sports. Roll on 3 years and I had somehow managed to have been talked into entering a Half Ironman in July 24 (eeekkk).

So I thought I had better do some training…

My objectives for the Walton Tri were as follows:

1. Swim.  I had taken swim lessons all winter (Full Stream – Lee, Riverbourne Leisure Centre Chertsey. Brilliant), but I was still not confident at front crawl (more of a reflection on my in-ability rather than Lee’s coaching). So objective 1 was: can I do the whole 400m doing front crawl without panicking??
2. Complete the triathlon
3. Get my legs used to the brick transitions (swim to bike and bike to run)
4. Have fun
5. Practice the transition
6. Learn from it.

The venue was great. Easy parking, swimming pool clean. The pre-day online registration and race briefing was efficient and helpful, and the marshalls were very relaxed on the day (they are always keen for marshalls). Plus lots of excited kids which gave it a good vibe.

So I arrived early, racked my bike, sorted my stuff, chatted to my fellow competitors, quick loo trip and I was ready. I did ask a particularly muscly young man next to me if he had ever done a triathlon before.  He looked at his tri bike with tri bars and lots of fancy paraphernalia and said “Yes.” Ha ha – a bit embarrassing for me. Never mind.

Swim: We had to queue up by our expected finish time, so I headed straight to the back. Chatted to the others at the back and realised I might be quicker than 3 lovely Chinese ladies (similar age to me) and 2 guys, who all convinced me they were definitely only going to do breaststroke. So I shuffled up the queue to position 6 from last. When you are not great at swimming, I find it really stressful slowing other people down behind me. So the swim was all about a positive mental attitude, calming myself down during the race, slow breathing, not panicking. I can do this!! I quickly got overtaken by the 2 guys (their breaststroke was quicker than my front crawl). That’s OK. The rules are you let people overtake before you turn, which was fine, and actually it was nice to know the faster swimmers were ahead. I managed about 50% of the swim front crawl and 50% breaststroke. So that’s fine, pleased with that, and onto the bike.

Transition was not timed, so I relaxed changed into my bike stuff and dried between my toes.

Bike: I am confident on this. So I hit the road with my Wahoo Element on to see if I could maintain a consistent 25km/h plus speed. The bike route was lovely. Flat, well marshalled, easy to navigate. Two loops of a course turning at a lovely church. I waved and cheered the 3 x Chinese ladies (plus one other lady) cycling on the other side of the road, and they waved and cheered back, which made us all giggle. There were some roadworks with traffic lights, which got me twice, but I welcomed the break to rehydrate (note to self – must practice rehydrating whilst cycling more). Bike done. Pleased with that. Onto the run.

Run: By this time I was feeling a bit tired, the sun was getting hotter and I hadn’t practiced much running recently. So this was going to be all about getting round. The route was along the river, a bit shaded, nice support, so all good. 2 laps. This is where I need to kick in my mental support. I can do this. This is fine. Keep going Al. With one foot in front of the other, a positive mental attitude, and congratulating my fellow athletes as we passed, I got round. With the obligatory high five jump, ‘jazz hands’ wave and smile whenever I saw an official photographer.

So by 9.15am the tri was done. It would have been lovely to chat to the Chinese ladies, but they had done the shorter route and were long gone. I was second to last overall (in front of the other lady on the bike), so had a lovely chat with her at the end (similar age to me, she had completed a Half Ironman before). Our bikes were the only 2 left in transition, which made us laugh. We congratulated each other on how fabulous we both were and then headed off for bacon sandwiches.

A great event, very well organised, lovely marshalls, very relaxed and nice routes. And Free!! The next one is 14th July.

Alison Lyons (aged 52). Not yet quite ready for World Champ Qualifiers, but getting there 😊

PS. Alison has since done another Free Tri and knocked 2 minutes and 20 seconds off her time! Whoop, whoop!

Event: The Grafman / ATW Middle Distance Triathlon
Date: 2nd June 2024

This was my first 70.3 event and I chose it because it involved a lake swim, and a relatively flat bike and run course with an elevation of only 600m and 130m respectively. Plus it had an achievable cut-off of 8.5 hours, the venue is only half an hour’s drive from my mum’s house in Cambridgeshire and it was good value at £130 entry fee!

With only around 300 participants, registration in the on-site café was quick and simple, although I nearly had a heart attack when I was told that the water was a fresh 14.5°. Time for a strong, hot cup of coffee!

Being a small event, set up was simple and it was easy to find my place on the rack and spot the various in/out points.

The swim is a mass swim entry with an “Aussie Exit” after the first lap. Because of the water temperature they allowed us to wear booties and neoprene hats (but not gloves) and announced that anyone not wanting to go back in after the first lap could just give their number to the marshal and drop to the “Grafman Lite”. I seriously considered it, especially when I made the first turn and hit choppy waters and then on the next turn started being lapped! But I knew that it would leave me with unfinished business….so back in I went to the cheers and screams of Alison Lyons who turned up to cheer me on totally by surprise!

I finally made it out (I’ve never been happier to finish a swim) to the cheers of the crowd, I think Alison made sure everyone knew my name 🤣. My hands were so cold I struggled to get out of my wetsuit and into my cycling gear but thankfully two of the volunteers came to the rescue and after around 7 minutes I was finally away.

The cycle section is on roads open to traffic but the roads in that part of the world are very quiet. It is made up of 4 out and back sections centred around the aid station which helped me mentally tick them off and makes it easy for any friends/family that want to support you.
Whilst it’s fairly flat, there are a few ramps to get you out of the saddle and a few open sections where the wind is not your friend. I took everything I needed with me so I didn’t stop at the aid station so I can’t comment on the offerings.

T2 was much better; after a quick shoe change and drink, I was off and running (wobbling) in 2 minutes. The run is made up of 4 laps on mixed terrain that snakes past transition twice per lap, meaning lots of opportunities for spectators to spur you on and hear shout-outs from the MC on the tannoy (everyone definitely knew my name by this point and Alison had even acquired a cowbell!).

Jason also brought the children to see me run and they even jogged alongside me for a few metres giving me a well needed boost. It was a great atmosphere.

My goal (other than just finishing) was to complete in under 8 hours which I did. Having never done another 70.30 I can’t compare, but if you’re looking for an event for next year I would wholeheartedly recommend The Grafman, or maybe join me at the full distance Odyssey (run by the same people in nearby St Neots)?!

Event: The Bull Ring 200
Date: 17th/18th/19th May 2024

The Bull Ring 200 is a MTB sportive over 3 days covering 338km and 5,000m of climbing that orbited Birmingham, linking some great and often lesser-known off-road riding spots.

Riding through Warwickshire, Worcestershire, Herefordshire, Shropshire and Staffordshire, the many highlights included some of the best off-road biking trails found in the West Midlands.

We encountered a huge array of trail gems, taking in bridleways, byways, singletrack, moorland, woodland, urban and some purpose-built MTB trails.

Not only was the riding superb, the views from the likes of Bredon Hill, the Malvern and the two Clee Hills were fantastic too.

The event started in the historical Forest of Arden area in Warwickshire and headed towards the Malvern Hills. The route then turned into the Shropshire Hills (Area of Outstanding Natural Beauty) before crossing the Severn Gorge at the UNESCO World Heritage site at Ironbridge.

It then went across the top of the West Midlands metropolis to join a full traverse of Cannock Chase, one of the best riding areas in England!

The final part of the route headed South and utilized some of the plentiful canals found in the West Midlands, as well as a full mixed bag of woodland and rural trails.

There were many surprises on this route, ranging from superb singletrack, gut wrenchingly steep climbs, great architecture, and a fascinating history.

Fortunately for once, the weather was kind to us, so we didn’t have to deal with wet kit whilst camping after tough days of riding!

Event: Madrid Marathon
Date: 27th April 2024

In an attempt to get some spring sunshine and a weekend away, I entered the Madrid Marathon and embarked on a short and insufficient training block. The trip, which took place in late April, got off to a bad start in that one of my two supporters who were joining me failed to get a passport in time which reduced us to a party of two; this proved to have a consequence on the race itself as I felt more obliged to stay out later and have a few too many beers on the Saturday night immediately before the race…oops.

Alas, the day of the race itself was bright and sunny and armed with a grande latte from Starbucks I embarked on the 2 mile walk to the start line – it was at this point I realised that Madrid was not a flat city and I may have underestimated the challenge that lay ahead. The marathon itself is part of a wider event that also includes a half marathon which started at the same time as the marathon and a 10km which I was fortunate to see the climax of as I was making my way to the start line. One last toilet stop and I managed to locate my starting corral alongside the 3.45 pacers (ambitious!).

The race forms part of the ‘Rock ‘n’ Roll’ running series which essentially meant that there was lots of loud music throughout; crossing the start line whilst ‘Highway to Hell’ blared out, certainly felt appropriate given what was to come. The first 5km took us north out of the city passing Real Madrid’s stadium ‘The Bernabeu’ and was almost exclusively uphill. The fact that the half marathoners were running alongside us at the same time meant the course was incredibly congested and I was already slipping behind the Garmin ‘pace pro’ time.

The course then wound its way back into the centre of Madrid through tunnels, over bridges and past a huge number of cafes which looked incredibly enticing. Unfortunately, the only refreshments I was set to enjoy that morning were water, Gatorade and SIS energy gels. Just after going through 19km the half marathoners broke off leaving the course a lot less congested which was appreciated, however, at this point, with the sun beating down, it was beginning to get warmer and the first signs of feeling uncomfortable became apparent.

I struggled on to the 27km mark where there was a well needed drinks station where the Gatorade shuffle was enabled. I wasn’t the only one struggling with a fellow competitor stepping off the course and taking his number off at this stage. Quitting was not an option for me and I was grateful for the tree cover providing shade as we worked our way through the Casa de Campo before looping back towards the city centre via another massive hill.

It was as I went through 34km that the uncomfortable feelings began to manifest themselves and a decline became inevitable. A lone Portaloo came into view which was just what was needed and I was so pleased that I had thought to pocket some toilet tissue as I was leaving the hotel room that morning as it was well needed. Apologies must go to the runner who was waiting to use the Portaloo after me for I had just turned it into a biohazard.

The final 8km was all about staying alive as the sweat was starting to cause chaffing issues everywhere. I employed a tactic of walking up the hills and shuffling on the flats and down hills with a renewed aim of coming in under 4 and a half hours. I’m glad to say I achieved this with quite a few minutes to spare, partly due to the help of a man dressed as a pirate with a megaphone who forced me to sprint alongside him 300m from the finish line. After deposing of him as he went back to encourage another hapless victim I stumbled across the finish line and promptly vomited right in front of some spectators. Shrugging off the advances of the first aiders, I made a beeline for the goody bag and refreshments table in search of some water and a banana.

Despite being accosted by fellow runners who wanted me to take a photograph of them, I managed to get some food and also found my mate Paul. The 2 mile walk back to the hotel was less spritely than the walk to the start of the race and this time punctuated by a trip to McDonalds.

After a quick shower, it was time to tear up the town and drink as much Spanish lager as my depleted stomach could take, which turned out to be quite a lot. Hills were mostly avoided as we stuck to streetside cafes and rooftop bars with the odd strip club thrown in for good measure.